Mastering Endings & New Beginnings
The deeper I delve into the spiritual principles that I coach, the more I see the value of reflecting on an ending, to create a powerful new beginning. 2022 for each one of us holds many gifts, even those tough experiences that we’re tempted to “skip over,” and we often don’t take time to pause and reflect on the many nuances that our life experiences hold. I had this opportunity for reflection at a recent retreat I attended in Jasper, and loved sharing this process with participants in my solstice masterclass.
2022 was an action-packed year for me and I appreciated the time to celebrate all of my accomplishments and wins. Our mammalian brain is wired to be on the lookout for what could go wrong, so it may feel counterintuitive for you to “be with, “and integrate the feeling of your successes and wins. Doing this creates new neuropathways and activates your brain’s RAS (reticular activating system). The more good you look for in your day-to-day life, the more you will see. This is science!!
So, your invitation is to look back over the last 12 months, and note what were your wins, big and small that you can celebrate? Know that without the small wins, the big ones would not happen, so acknowledge those too. Preparing for my cycling trip was intense. Everyday, for six weeks I took action steps towards the day I would depart. Each step taken was a win. The day I set out, I was terrified. In retrospect finishing my first day of cycling was possibly a bigger win then my ending on Parliament hill.
When you write those wins down, ask yourself what was it “within me” that caused that success or win? Was it your mindset? Making a decision? Not allowing others talk you out of your decision? Not allowing yourself to talk you out of your dream? Persistence? Moving forward in spite of fear? For me it was all of the above and really leaning into “faith,” that the Power breathing me would bring it all together. I was not disappointed!
When you look at these past 12 months, what are you proud of? As you respond to these questions do you feel empowered? It is so easy to default to our “mistakes.” It takes mindfulness to consciously cultivate the good that is inherently within us. I am proud of constantly living into the question, what makes me feel more alive, and listening deeply to the voice of truth. It takes rigor to over-ride the voice of fear. Know that fear will be a player when you are moving beyond what you know. I am also proud of saying “yes” to everything that was offered to me on this trip. I met the best people and even spent 3 days sailing on Lake Ontario. I proud of my belief in the goodness of people.
As you look back on 2022, what would you love to have less of, or what happened in the year that wasn’t your preference? Sometimes we are presented with circumstances that are not of our choosing, such as caring for aging parents, the death of loved ones, or changes in our work environment. Successful people know “that within every adversity, heart ache and failure is the seed of an equal or greater benefit.” (Napoleon Hill) We don’t always see this right away. It is said that it takes 7 miles to turn a ship around. When I experienced the loss of my mother and brother 5 years ago, I grieved! It is so important to not do a spiritual bypass on these difficult feelings. I felt mine. And it’s just as important to listen deeply and discern when it is time to move forward. I sensed when the time came, and know the courage it takes to release the past and move on. This year I harvested the seed of my heartache… when I wrote my book “What If You Could?” and set out on my bike to celebrate my brother’s life and find meaning in his death. It happened in the right and perfect time! There is a beautiful quote by Rev. Michael Beckwith that may support you if you cannot yet see the gift, he writes: “There is good here that I may not be aware of right now. Let me stay open to that good revealing itself to me.”
And the other end of this question is: What would I love more of in 2023. What did you love about 2022, that you want more of? More time off, more fun, more income, more holiday travel, more opportunity to rekindle old connections or create new ones? I loved the opportunity to “connect” in person with others this year, and the sense of adventure I experienced on my cycling tour. It felt so expansive after living in a bubble for two years… and I KNOW I WANT MORE OF THIS IN 2023!
Two final questions to intentionally close 2022: Do you have any loose ends from 2022 that you need to bring completion? Write down any unfinished business or energy that comes to mind, so you can wrap up it up. Unfinished business creates leaky energy. Unresolved, it can take your energy away from your priorities for 2023. Here are some options for clearing this energy.
-Decide if you want to delete anything you may have written down, maybe its not important anymore.
-Decide if you want to delegate some things on your list. Maybe you want to hire a painter to paint the bedroom that you thought you would get to and didn’t.
-Maybe you want to renegotiate a loose end and take care of it by a certain date in the new year. If this is the case, put it on your calendar and do it! By Feb. 28, I commit to … (Be impeccable with your word for yourself.)
Bringing closure to your loose ends, will set you up to bring your full attention to your new goals in 2023.
Finally, bring to mind anyone you’d like to thank or acknowledge for the contribution they’ve made to your life this year? List anyone that comes to mind. I encourage you to let them know the impact they’ve made for you. None of us do life alone, we need each other! By sending your appreciation and thanks to them, you’re going to feel better and you will light up their life. Gratitude is such an expansive state. It really is the gift that keeps on giving.
So here we are ending 2022 with mastery to intentionally enter and create a new beginning in 2023. The sacred gift of another day, week, month and year of life. I want to celebrate you and your willingness to take time with these questions for reflection. It is said that the quality of our life is determined by the questions we ask…So now what? What would you love to create in 2023? What would make you come alive? What is seeking to emerge in you? What is your vision for the coming year... well lived?
Eleanor Roosevelt said : “The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”
May you believe in the beauty of yours! Blessings and warmest best wishes for an amazing 2023! Lynne