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Doing It Afraid


This last week has certainly provided me with an idea of what conditions I will at times be facing as I live into my biking tour - book promotion dream. This past weekend I did an overnight training run with my biking friend and mentor Susan, who is my inspiration and a force to be reckoned with. She has a few trips under her belt and I am so grateful for here willingness to share her experience, strength and belief in me.

Early in the week when we planned our Saturday-Sunday overnight trip, the weather looked perfect. Sunny +18’ish, but is not at all what played out. Saturday morning the sky opened and the rain came down. We sat on Susan’s deck drinking coffee and waiting for it to stop, and finally go set out about noon. Before this experience I had no context as to what riding with a packed bike feels like and this in itself is not what I had imagined. Not only was I carrying a lot of weight, at this point I “noticed” I was carrying a lot of fear. I realized this is going to take some getting used to, and I am trusting (and praying) my confidence will grow. It also didn’t help that we set off into a “very” strong south east wind, the direction we were headed. After pedalling about four hours and getting no where fast we decided to head back and set up camp for the night, and we decided on the perfect spot-sheltered from the wind, quiet-away the highway noise, and peaceful- not a campground but the Bismarck Cemetery. A first for both of us and a preview of what’s to come…lol?? We set up camp, enjoyed our supper and eventually made our way into our separate tents to listen to the coyote’s serenade us for awhile. Throughout the night I awoke to hear it raining again, and it continued until morning. It didn’t bother the birds, in the midst of it they were happily singing their little hearts out. Another learning “opportunity” presented itself- packing up a wet tent. In spite of all this, here is the good news. We had a tail wind going home- I had the opportunity to experience riding on 5 miles of gravel, and it didn’t start to drizzle until we were about an hour from home.

This training ride was an incredibly valuable learning experience for me…just like the flat tire last week. It's about not letting fear stop me. It’s all about learning to be with what is and deciding what meaning I’ll give it. I came home having a much better idea what is ahead of me. I am re-thinking what and how I will pack my panniers-what’s practical and what isn’t. And daily I am grateful for all the ways I am being supported. Susan’s mentorship has been invaluable. I am so grateful that she believes in me, because there are times right now when my belief is not strong. I spent yesterday afternoon in gratitude for my bike repair person-Warren who patiently showed me how to adjust my brakes, and gears if need be. My neighbour Lawrence-cut my metal curtain rod into 2inch lengths, so I can repair my tent poles should they break (Susan said be ready for, this who’d have guessed?) My pickleball group has generously offered to fundraise a donation to jack.org/whatifyoucouldtour on my behalf. I have already raised $1000 for jack.org and I haven’t started yet (only $99,000 to go!) My book illustrations are so endearing and I am grateful for Kiran’s creativity and my publisher for taking my inspired book, “What If You Could” into the world. I am grateful for my friend Jamie who set out ahead of me on her bike- May 25 and daily is blazing the trail for me, as she’s destined for PEI. You go girl!! I’m grateful for my sons and friends who are supporting me and for all the encouragement I am getting from everyone reading my posts. Right now, this is fueling my believing, because there are moments when I do not feel strong and confident…and this is when I remind myself that this is what it looks like while it is all coming together. I keep telling myself to stay the course, face the storms, do it afraid and go for the dream! And I listen for the voice that says “what if you could Lynne”?

Blessings, Lynne


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